unfortunate words

My boss just walked into our department to ask me a question about my time card. My co-worker mentioned that she had gone home early a few days before because she was sick.

"Oh, are you the one who got me sick?" he said.

"Are you sick? I'm sorry!"

"Me too. I've had a horrible case of diapoopsy for days now!"


Diapoopsy. The end.

what I am thankful for

I'm so blessed. Love you.

Christmas everywhere

Today was Christmas decorating time at Volkwein's Music. Now, to get a better idea of where I work, picture "The Office". The crazy boss that says inappropriate things, I work with a girl just like Pam, our 'Toby' works in the Piano/Vocal department, and Stanley is in Instrumental music... You think I'm joking. I am not. Come visit sometime and see this mayhem for yourself.

Now- picture old garland, bulbs, plastic Christmas trees, iridescent glittery garland, and twinkle-lights of all colors and sizes thrown around that office in various places. Behind the filing cabinets, twisted around the poles of electrical wires throughout the store, stuck on top of the filing cabinets. It was pretty insane. It's only been 4 hours and I am already annoyed with them. So, there is Christmas music blasting, cookies and hot chocolate in the break-room and we are trying to figure out where to put everything. It was a very amusing morning, actually. Our 'Toby' (aka Steve) is quite tall and was helping us by putting the lights around the electrical poles. He did it by standing on a step stool on top of my desk. Another co-worker, Barb (Phyllis) watched on as he struggled.
Barb: Hey, while you're up there, you might as well give us a little dance around that pole! Steve: There's not enough Wassail in the world for that to ever happen.

fun facts

I don't really like Halloween. Never really been a big fan. I don't really like traffic either. Maybe I should have thought of that before I moved to Pittsburgh, one of the hardest cities in the entire world to drive in. I do really like it here, though, besides the driving... I live in a city with the nations 5th oldest opera company and the world's first museum of modern art! Carnegie Museum of Art opened in 1895. The arts are thriving here in so many ways! There is always a show to see or a symphony concert to hear. It's wonderful. I don't love all things about Pittsburgh, though. The number one reason is because it is far away from you, not all of you, but some of you, and that makes me sad. But that won't change with any city I decide to live in, I guess. I can't wait to be in Heaven with all of you, so I can see you all the time- forever! Woot woot!

I've learned a lot about Pittsburgh in the last few months. Here are a few "fun facts", if you will.

70% of the population is native to the city.

It is 2nd only to Miami as having the largest number of registered watercraft.

Second only to Venice, Italy, Pittsburgh has the the largest number of bridges in a city.

Pittsburgh is within 500 miles of more than half the U.S. population and less than 90 minutes flying time from 20 states and Canada.

USA Today rated the cityscape view from Mt. Washington as the second best in America (1st was Sedona, Arizona).
Gene Kelly was from Pittsburgh!

The Big Mac was "invented" in Pittsburgh by McDonald's franchise owner Jim Delligatti in 1968. (booooo...)
Second only to Seattle to Pittsburgh has the most cloudy days per year.

Well, friends, I hope you are all well and are enjoying this beautiful autumn we are having. Miss you always. God Bless.

a very warm house

It's been too long, I know. I'm not sure if anyone still reads this but don't worry- I haven't forgotten about you. Much has happened and blessings are abounding in my life. Here is the short and sweet version of it. I moved to Pittsburgh and live with Abbie and Jayme which is possibly one of the most delightful experiences. We have a cute little house in Highland Park near the zoo and thanks to many donations of furnishings from our family and friends, it is finally becoming a home. I work at a large music store called Volkwein's in the Choral department 40 hours a week, 8-5... joining the work force with the best of them. I work with a few very nice women and we have a lot of fun. I am also starting graduate school at the end of the month! I am taking online classes at Liberty University to get my M.A. in Religion with an emphasis in Worship Studies. I truly feel God calling me into Music Ministry and I am so excited about starting these classes! There is actually a possible job opportunity at a church near here where I might hire me to work part time as the worship director. It's not definite yet, but we'll see.
Last weekend was Grove City's homecoming, so we decided to have our friends from college who were in town up for a housewarming party. A bunch of people showed up including the Browne's! which was wonderful. It was so great to see everyone and we were SO blessed by the time we were able to spend with everyone. There were candles and roses and great things to eat... It was just so amazing to see everyone. I don't think I stopped smiling all night. I hope to hear from you all soon- and don't hesitate to stop by our place! We love guests!I was convicted once again by O. Chambers in "My Utmost". I hope you are blessed by this as well. Miss you and love you all.

September 29- The Awareness of the Call
"We are inclined to forget the deeply spiritual and supernatural touch of God. If you are able to tell exactly where you were when you received the call of God and can explain all about it, I question whether you have truly been called. The call of God does not come like that; it is much more supernatural. The realization of the call in a person’s life may come like a clap of thunder or it may dawn gradually. But however quickly or slowly this awareness comes, it is always accompanied with an undercurrent of the supernatural— something that is inexpressible and produces a "glow." At any moment the sudden awareness of this incalculable, supernatural, surprising call that has taken hold of your life may break through— "I chose you . . ." ( John 15:16 ). The call of God has nothing to do with salvation and sanctification. You are not called to preach the gospel because you are sanctified; the call to preach the gospel is infinitely different. Paul describes it as a compulsion that was placed upon him.

If you have ignored, and thereby removed, the great supernatural call of God in your life, take a review of your circumstances. See where you have put your own ideas of service or your particular abilities ahead of the call of God. Paul said, ". . . woe is me if I do not preach the gospel!" He had become aware of the call of God, and his compulsion to "preach the gospel" was so strong that nothing else was any longer even a competitor for his strength.

If a man or woman is called of God, it doesn’t matter how difficult the circumstances may be. God orchestrates every force at work for His purpose in the end. If you will agree with God’s purpose, He will bring not only your conscious level but also all the deeper levels of your life, which you yourself cannot reach, into perfect harmony."

summer is here!

Woah. It's been a whiiiile since I've been on here. Thanks to those who actually look to even see if I have updated. I get bored with myself most of the time, so way to go! So- I graduated from college... pretty cool, eh? If my degree wasn't in vocal performance I would be making money right now instead of hanging around the house. No worries, though, I've got a few auditions lined up for the fall and a great job singing all summer- I have nothing at all to complain about. My family is great, my friends are great (most are abandoning single-hood and getting married this summer but its okay... some of my best friends are either marrying each other or are marrying people I absolutely adore), and I'm excited about life.
I guess a lot has happened since we've last talked. ABT Spring Party was on the Gateway Clipper. We danced, we ate, we just had a great time. (That picture is of me and Robbie at Spring Party :-)). Another thing I got to do was camping at Cook's Forrest with the girls on my freshman hall from GCC. Twelve girls in a 2 bedroom cabin was awesome! It was so much fun- with hiking, bug bites, s'mores, and ghost stories. Next time you want a good story, ask me about the "I see your hiney" incident. Hehe. Good times. That picture is of my roommates and I (Lori, Ruth, and Leigh). I miss them already. BUT- speaking of roommates... I got to spend an entire 5 days in Tahoka, Texas with Leigh (the one on the far right and the one laughing hysterically on the left) a few weeks ago. I flew down to see her and it was just great. We saw longhorns, had a Dixie-dog and watched some amazing lightning storms. It was so great to finally see where she grew up. I've heard about it for so long and I got to see it for myself! It was just how I pictured it- flat and hot! There they are: Mark, Amy, Leigh, and Vivian. I am so blessed to have these people in my life. And finally the next wonderful thing to happen was that my brother-in-law graduated from the Ohio State University with his PhD! Isn't he cute in his robe!? Congratulations, Dr. Nicholas John Dekker!!! So proud of you!
Well-- I'm leaving for the summer on Saturday... talk to you when I'm up in New York.

God Bless!

an italian feast

This post is long overdue. I was waiting for pictures of this event, but they never came. Thus, I must describe this wonderful experience using just my words. I guess it was about a month ago now- my dear friend, Christopher Scott Aitken (isn't that a great name? I totally want to name one of my kids Christopher Scott...) had me and 7 of his other friends over for a 7-course Italian meal. With the help of his fearless side kick, the funniest guy in my life (well- my brother-in-law is a contender for this position as well), Aaron Gottier, he served the following: an assorted cheese plate, Shrimp Cocktail, Insalata: arugula, pear, and asiago cheese, Lemon sorbet (ya know, per pulire del palato), Bruchetta, Manicotti and per dolce: Cinnamon meringue with whipped cream and raspberries.
The best part about it was that it was all made from scratch- yes, even the sorbet which was served inside the frozen lemon garnished with mint leaves. And everything was presented so elegantly, not just the food. There were names with each place setting at the table, along with a beautiful center piece adorned with red roses and rose petals. It was elegant and classy. And to tell you the truth, it was a little surreal.
Here I was sitting down at this wonderful meal set up by my friends just because they wanted to serve us. They didn't even sit down and eat with us. They cleared our plates after each course, brought drinks around, asked us if we ever needed anything. I tried to help and they wouldn't let me! Aaron kicked me out of the kitchen numerous times. I don't think I have ever been served like that before by my friends. I have never been loved in that way before.
I felt honored to be friends with these people. It was just such a special evening- one of the best nights I have had at Grove City, hands down. It made my heart smile- a lot.

Oh, and sorry for the scary picture- it's the best one I could find of those guys :-).

feel the nanger

Have you ever been singing to the radio in your car with one of your friends in the front seat and suddenly the words you are singing are not the actual words in the song? First, they look at you kind of funny, question whether or not the lyrics they are singing are correct, and then start laughing hysterically at the ridiulous thing you just said.
I have been studying for a Modern Europe test that I have tomorrow with Tilford (whom I love dearly) for the past few days, and late at night I get a little loopy. For some reason I was talking about my brother, Chip, and then the theme song to "Chip and Dale's Rescue Rangers" pops into my head. It was all downhill from there. I started singing it and my roommate Lori looks at me with that "those are totally not the right lyrics" look on her face. Not only was I not singing the right words, the words I was singing weren't even actual words. "Ch-ch-ch-Chip and Dale, Rescue Rangers/Ch-ch-ch-Chip and Dale, FEEL THE NANGER". What? What does that even mean? I googled it, and all I can come up with is that a 'nanger' has something to do animals, at least thats what it said after being translated by my spanish-major roommate from a spanish exotic bird website... or in the "Urban dictionary" it is defined as this:
1. Nanger- An ugly or slightly mutned person; A ranky; a person not worthy of a second look, except for a chuckle.
2. Nanger- Nerd + Anger = Nanger
A subservient but biting anger towards normal members of society, resulting from both years of taunting and/or exclusion and the nerd's own insecurities.
Wow. I looked waaaaay to into this, didn't I?
As a child, did I honestly think they were saying that, or was I just trying to fit in because my two oldest siblings were screaming the theme song at the top of their lungs? And you probably already know this (and laughed out loud at me as a child when I said it wrong... ahem... Beth... Chip), but the real lyrics to that is "where there's danger", which makes much more sense. Alright. Must sleep.

under control

Happy April!

I get a break. For 10 whole days, I get to spend time with my friends and family for Easter- the first time I have been at home for Easter in 3 years. My beautiful roommate, Leigh, and I are driving up to Cape Cod for few days on Tuesday to relax a little bit. A friend of mine is letting us use her beach house, which was such a blessing! It might not be super warm, but I will be near the beach and that is enough for me. I love the beach, no matter how cold it is. There is just something about seeing God in all His majesty through the power of the ocean. It makes me feel like no matter what I do I won't be able to control it- a feeling I love. There are too many times that I realize that I am stressing about something because I'm trying to control it. But God calls us to be completely dependent on Him. It's pretty amazing to know that He has got it under control.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

where have i been

So many wonderful things have happened since my last entry. I'm just downloading my pictures from my camera now... how could I forget some of these things! As the little guy in "Finding Nemo" said, I am ashamed.

I went to Grand Rapids to see my sister on her birthday. I met all of her lovely friends, which was great! Here they are-- don't worry, they're not actually sad. We just saw some very disturbing giant pieces of breakfast food that little children were playing on in a kid's area of a mall. Scary.
I went to Chicago to visit some friends a few weeks ago and met some new ones as well! It was amazing to see them again. I hadn't seen them since last summer and I was going through withdrawl.
Peter got a new camera-- he's was pretty giddy.
Peter Nilsen and Kit Bogan. Sigh. Just wonderful. There are no other words to describe.
The girls at Blue-Man Group! (from left: Michelle, Ginger, and Morgan) It was pretty great, Michelle knew someone and we got to usher and see the show for FREE. All of us after a lovely meal.

At the beginning of the month, Alpha Beta Tau had our retreat at my house- with a bake-off! It was an amazing time of fellowship with some of my favorite girls in the world.
Hmm... other things going on...
I'm sure you will be excited to know that I passed my senior recital hearing and will be officially giving my senior recital on April 22nd, 2007, at 2:30pm in the Pew Recital Hall at Grove City College. Did you get that? Is it on your calendar? Are you suuuure? Good. I will hope to see you there- you will get to hear 5 languages... you'll laugh, you'll cry... it will move you. Well, I hope so anyway. I'll try my darndest.
A big praise- I got into a few graduate schools. Things are still up in the air yet though because I need to hear about the financial end of things and I am also waiting to hear from one more school (and from the Big Guy upstairs). Good thing God knows what is happening in the future because I certainly don't!

I just wanted my sisters to know that they are beautiful.

Well, I went home for the first time in a month. I walked into the house really late (after going to a PSO concert of John Williams' pieces- fabulous!) on Saturday night and I could tell a few things were off. First of all, the house smelled of baked goods. The only time my house smells like baked things is if Marcia and my Daddy make cinnamon roles (which taste like little bites of heaven, by the way), or if Abbey is home and makes a million cookies for no reason at all. Both of these things were improbable because Marcia is in Columbus and Abbey is in Grand Rapids. I just kind of chalked it up to my parents doing some experimental baking. Then, I set my bags down and went over to the refrigerator to get some Fresca, which I was very excited about. When I opened the frig door I saw soy milk. Now, there is nothing at all wrong with soy milk. I actually really like it-- but this was the 2nd thing that had changed after being in my house for only 2 minutes. Baked goods and soy milk. Where was I? As I put the Fresca back after pouring myself a glass, I saw chocolate milk sitting on the shelf as well. Chocolate MILK? Who were these people? Had someone brain-washed my parents? This was not the same kitchen I remembered. I remember skim milk and whole milk, as a child but never, I mean, NEVER chocolate.
I don't know what it is about smells but for some reason certain smells bring back the most vivid memories. It truly is incredible. I walked downstairs to my basement and a memory came shooting back. It didn't smell like I remember my basement smelling. It smelled like Emily's parents house back in Greenville when they still lived a few blocks from the high school. All these memories of my childhood in that house came flooding back- the soft pretzel's Mrs. Taylor used to bring us, the movies we used to watch, the Buffalo Bills paraphernalia hanging on the walls, the backroom trundle bed and all of the sleepovers we had there. It made my heart very happy. So, Hi Mrs. Taylor- I miss you and hope we can see one another soon. Thanks for the amazing memories and being the best at all those little things you always did for us.

But it's okay that things are changing. It hit me that night, that I am going to grow up and nothing is going to stop it. I pray that the rest of my life was as wonderful as my childhood, because I have nothing but wonderful memories of it. So, things may change from time to time and my parents may start buying chocolate milk but I was blessed with such an amazing childhood that things can change as much as they want. I had my soft pretzels, my skim milk and my wonderful family. And all of those things make me smile.

and we were here for it

For Grove City College students, this day will go down in history. It is the first time since the winter of 1993 that school has been cancelled due to the weather. The administration emailed us just moments ago that due to the massive amounts of snow that we have accumulated over the past 24 hours, there will be no school. As soon as we got the email, students lept for joy at the thought of having a whole day to themselves. I walked into Colonial Hall Apartments and girls were screaming running down the halls (little over-worked, eh?). Plans of sled-riding, icecream eating, movie watching, and pillow flighting have been made. It's a glorious thing.
A letter from President Jewell that sent students into a state of euphoria:
"Due to rapidly deteriorating weather conditions to include ice, wind and drifting snow now forecast through tomorrow, all classes and public events at Grove City College are cancelled for tomorrow, Wednesday, February 14, 2007. Thank you for your understanding and cooperation."
So, Congrats, Grovers. And have fun. You certainly deserve it!

at least one conclusion

I don't want to grow up yet.

Psalm 40

Blessed is the man
who makes the LORD his trust,
who does not look to the proud,
to those who turn aside to false gods.

Many, O LORD my God,
are the wonders you have done.
The things you planned for us
no one can recount to you;
were I to speak and tell of them,
they would be too many to declare.

Sacrifice and offering you did not desire,
but my ears you have pierced;
burnt offerings and sin offerings
you did not require.
Then I said, "Here I am, I have come--
it is written about me in the scroll.

I desire to do you will, O my GOD; your law is within my heart."

v. 4-8 (thanks for the photo, pete)

disdain for the American "idol"

As many of you know, there are very few things in this world that I hate. I probably couldn't name 5 things that I absolutely cannot stand. But I think I have added one more to my very short list- American Idol.
Why, you might ask, do you hate it so? Aren't you a singer? Isn't that what you would love to do? Umm. No. American Idol isn't singing. It is an embarrassment to the world of vocal arts.

I sat with my mother during our quality time and listened to every auditionee from Seattle and Minneapolis this past week. But it was all I could do not to throw up from the horrible feeling I had for the people auditioning. They were being harassed and ridiculed. These people get the guts enough to go up in front of judges, in front of millions of viewers and sing their little hearts out and they just laugh right in their faces. I'm not by any means saying that they were good- most, if not all of them, could not sing their way out of a paper bag, but they were trying. (Unfortunately they didn't realize they were bad before coming to the show, that would have saved them the embarrassment a little, but still). There are other ways to say that they are not meant for the stage other than laughing at them. It's called tact. It's called constructive criticism. It's called DECENCY. I felt nauseous for the people auditioning- I was physically ill.

On the other hand, I can see it from the judges perspective- "What in the world is this person doing here!? They are tone deaf!" And hearing those kind of people over and over again cannot be fun. But these are the "professional" judges that are supposedly some of the best in the business, yet they use words like "pitchy". They always say "It's a little too pitchy for me." What the heck does that mean? Are there too many pitches? Not enough pitches? It makes no sense. Not in any of my million music classes and/or ensembles have I ever been more or less "pitchy" than I should have been. Why? Because it's not a word, folks.

So instead of having a decent competition between viable competitors, America wants to watch inarticulate "professional" musicians ridicule, dismiss, harass, and laugh at people that cannot sing to save their lives. Does anyone else think this is a little sick?

it's faith that gives stability

(photo by Ryan Lyhnam)

I miss Italy. I didn't think I would this much, but I do. Maybe I miss it because in some strange way, it was stable to me. My own apartment, great classes, great lessons. I knew what I was doing everyday, I knew what was coming next and I didn't look too far into the future. But at the same time, I was in a place I didn't know- it was new and exciting and there was certainly variety, a must in my life. Every weekend would be different, every morning. How could this place feel more stable than the my own home? With everything I have ever known so close?

Oh wait.

Perhaps its because I have no idea what I am going to do with my life. Nothing in my life seems to be stable. I've applied to graduate schools for performance but there is no guarentee and even if I do get in- what are the odds of me actually being a singer for the rest of my life? I feel too logical and realistic for music to be a passion of mine. I barely know what I am going to do next summer let alone what I want to do for the rest of my life. Auditions are coming up and I'm nervous. I have to make a lot of decisions about my life in the very near future. But all of these things are silly.

Because God is taking care of me. I'm happy- really happy. He's got something huge planned. Yeah, it may not be in the center of La Scala's stage and it may not be a record deal, but I know it will be perfect. Because that is what His will is.

Trust. Pray. And take big deep breaths.