(photo by Ryan Lyhnam)I miss Italy. I didn't think I would this much, but I do. Maybe I miss it because in some strange way, it was stable to me. My own apartment, great classes, great lessons. I knew what I was doing everyday, I knew what was coming next and I didn't look too far into the future. But at the same time, I was in a place I didn't know- it was new and exciting and there was certainly variety, a must in my life. Every weekend would be different, every morning. How could this place feel more stable than the my own home? With everything I have ever known so close?
Oh wait.
Perhaps its because I have no idea what I am going to do with my life. Nothing in my life seems to be stable. I've applied to graduate schools for performance but there is no guarentee and even if I do get in- what are the odds of me actually being a singer for the rest of my life? I feel too logical and realistic for music to be a passion of mine. I barely know what I am going to do next summer let alone what I want to do for the rest of my life. Auditions are coming up and I'm nervous. I have to make a lot of decisions about my life in the very near future. But all of these things are silly.
Because God is taking care of me. I'm happy- really happy. He's got something huge planned. Yeah, it may not be in the center of La Scala's stage and it may not be a record deal, but I know it will be perfect. Because that is what His will is.
Trust. Pray. And take big deep breaths.
3 comments:
Great post. Approaching a limbo stage is definitely not without its stresses. It's important to keep the perspective you do.
It's easy even in grad school to think "at lease I don't have to decide anything for another two years." Except that it doesn't take into consideration that time is always flying faster and faster.
That's awesome that you're applying to grad school...there's so much we don't know about anything! AGHH!
Anyway, are you at intersession? or is that an older pic of Harbison?
I hope you're doing fantastically!
It was great talking to you...I'll keep in touch.
Keep the faith.
What a beautiful picture Kate!
You are amazing!! I understand your feelings of uncertainty...but things will fall into place. You work to hard for them not too and you have the talent...continue to be faithful!!
We LOVE you!!
Let's say you don't make a clear decision in the near future. What is the worst that could happen? After all, you can wander around for a while and still go to grad school. Just look at me!
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